Here are a few pics from Destin! The sand and water are beautiful there! That is where we spent part of the girls Spring Break. They had a cheer competition there that lasted 2 days. Mylah loves the sand!
~Amber
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Monday, April 19, 2010
EASTER
Mylah loves the beach!
Meagan and Zack (Niece/Nephew)
Saran wrap on cast does not work!
At an Easter egg hunt in Florida at a children's park
These were taken in our yard!
Ivey and Mylah at church Easter party!
Hi! I'm behind on the blog...what's new?! This has to be a quick post too, because I have many other things I need to be taking care of! Just wanted to say that Mylah had a wonderful 1st Easter! We spent the weekend with my parents, and my sister and her family. We stayed at my parents condo which is in Florida! It was a beautiful weekend! The water was still too cold to swim in, but all the kids enjoyed just being outdoors and playing in the sand. Mylah had her first experience with sand. She loved it! She crawled all around and kept picking it up and throwing it around! It got in her hair...which was a little challenging to get out! Not as hard as I thought it would be though.
Brennan's leg was in a cast, which is not fun to deal with while at the beach! She used tons of garbage bags to keep the sand out! The bags kept tearing, so she ended up with sand in it anyway! Ivey also spilled milk down inside her cast...YUCK! She was glad to finally get that stinky, sticky thing off 4 days after Easter! Brennan woke up Easter morning and immediately began vomiting.
:( It seems like that child always has a stomach bug on holidays! There have been a few times that she has spent her Christmas day vomiting! Talk about bad luck! She did not even eat any of her Easter goodies for about 2 days...they just sat in her basket tempting me! LOL
Mylah had a good time pulling everything out of her basket! I also took tons of pictures with her in different baskets! I had a great time...Mylah could have done without the photo sessions! LOL Some of the pics were taking at our home, and some were taken on the beach. These were done on different days...I would just take a few at a time b/c she would get tired of it quickly!
Brennan and Ivey just went back to school today from having their Spring Break. Mylah and I are missing them! We can't wait till they are out for summer!!!! We went to Destin, Fl. for a few days then to my parents condo which is located in another area of Fl. They had a good vacation from school. Brennan was still in her cast, but she didn't miss out on much b/c the water is still a little cold to enjoy.
Ivey lost her first tooth during Spring Break! She was sooo excited! She is a very brave girl and let her daddy pull it right out! I tried to get it out first, but I am just no good at that! She patiently let me tug on it about 10 times...then I gave up! I hate loose teeth anyway, they have always just really creeped me out! I know I'm a nurse and not many things bother me, but teeth are just YUCK! Anything having to do with teeth or eyeballs...I just can't stand! Danny on the other hand LOVES pulling teeth! One of Brennan's friends (Kendall) has even come over when she needed one pulled! LOL
We are so blessed to be celebrating all of these firsts with Mylah! I think she had a great first Easter and we can't wait to share many more first memories with her!!!
Blessings~
AmberFriday, March 5, 2010
WHAT IS FAMILY?
First let me start by saying..."Dear Lord please help me with this post...I have been avoiding it for so long"! So many times I have attempted to get this post out of my head and onto this computer screen. It just can't be put off any longer. Mylah is getting older, and her vocabulary is growing continuously. For those of you who are around our family often, it is crucial for you to use positive adoption language around her. Brennan and Ivey have caught onto the lingo easily, I promise it's not hard. And there won't be a test afterwards! LOL I have gently tried to correct many people on several occasions, hoping that they would catch on to the proper words. It's not happening people! I know they are not trying to be rude, they just don't know the proper language to use. LOL So, here is "What is Family 101".
I want Mylah to grow up confident in the family she's in...and confident in the skin she's in. Adoption will play a big role in her life, but it shouldn't define her. She is not "our adopted child", she is simply "our child". When I speak of Brennan and Ivey I don't say, "Brennan, my biological child....". It's the same with adopted children. We should not refer to them as the adopted child when speaking of them. Most of them know they are adopted, just as bio. children know they are bio. We do not need to clarify this when speaking of them. Now, this changes a bit when speaking to strangers about our family. Like at church, we may meet someone new who is curious about how our family was formed. I don't mind at all "defining" my children in these moments, because it is done to educate someone about adoption and how it has blessed our family. Of course during a time like that I may say something like "We adopted Mylah as an infant through private domestic adoption". Let me give an example of something that would be offensive to an adopted child though. Let's say you are a friend of mine and my family is at your child's birthday party. You are introducing us to another family. Please never say something like, "This is Danny, Amber, Brennan, Ivey, and their adopted daughter Mylah". You wouldn't point out that Brennan and Ivey are bio. Most people are going to get it by just looking at us....I mean look at us! LOL They can ask questions, and I don't mind answering about how one of our children looks so much different from us. It's just not polite to label an adopted child when introducing them.
Adoption is by no means second best.The way we talk-and the words we choose-say alot about what we think and value. Family ties formed by adoption are no "less real" than those formed by blood. For example, Brennan and Ivey are not MORE sisters just because they share the same DNA. Mylah is just as equally Brennan's sister as Ivey is. Biology is a great connection too, it's just not what makes them sisters. Biology just comes in handy if you need a kidney or something like that! My kids are just my kids. One is not better than the other because she is biological and not adopted. Adoption is a way to build a family, just as birth is. Both are important, but one is not more important than the other.
I AM Mylah's mommy :) We are her FOREVER FAMILY. She is not borrowed, not on loan, and not going back to her birth mom. She was not stolen or taken, but instead, lovingly placed in our family by a precious woman. A woman who for her own valid reasons, chose me to be Mylah's mommy. "T" and I spent 3 nights and 4 days together at the time of Mylah's birth. She told me over and over again things like "You feed her, you're her mom"..."You change her, you are her mom", and when the birth certificate lady came "T" said "You tell her the name you want on the paperwork, you are her mom." If "T" were here right now and you asked her "Who is Mylah's mom?" She would tell you, without hesitation, that it is me. I know this because "T" and I talk frequently and we have a great relationship. "T" would also tell you that she is Mylah's birth mom. "T" has 3 children that she is parenting. She knows how tough a mom's job is, and she knows what makes a mom. "T" was adopted herself, and will be the 1st to tell you that DNA is not what makes a mommy and daddy. So often I hear things like..."Have you talked to Mylah's mom lately?" or, "I saw the pics of Mylah's mom on your blog, that is so sweet". I try to gently correct by saying "Oh yeah, I talked to her birth mom last week and she is doing well". But, the terminology never seems to stick. If you spend one day with me and Mylah you will see that I am 100% her mom, regardless of who birthed her. She calls me "MaMa", and it's one of the sweetest things I've ever heard! :) If you hold a picture up of "T" and one of me and ask Brennan or Ivey..."Point to Mylah's mom" they will point to me without even having to think about it. Mommies wipe noses, dry tears, get up at all hours of the night to feed or change a diaper, worry about their kids when they are sick, go to Dr. visits, ect....I am the only woman who does all this and more for Mylah. I am her mom.
I have a biological father out there, somewhere! Lord only knows where! Is he my father? My dad? Just because we share DNA? Absolutely not! I have had no relationship with him since I was three years old. He's never even sent me a birthday card, probably doesn't even remember what day I was born. I don't have a "dad". I have a step-father whom I call by his first name "George". He loves me, and I love him...but he is not my dad. He didn't come into my life until I was in High School. I guess I was just a little old to feel like I needed a dad at that point, so he was simply "George". I guess that's sortof the way I see Mylah's relationship with her birthmom going. I think they will love one another, but she will simply be "T"...not mom. Mom or dad is someone who raises you, and shares your life with you on a daily basis...not just occassionally.
Now, pretend for a minute that YOU are Mylah. You are 3, 4, 5 years old (something like that). You are at the grocery store. Along comes Sally, (who apparently didn't read this post! LOL). Sally says to me,"When is the last time you talked to Mylah's mom?" Now, what is Mylah thinking? A) Who is this weird lady asking my mom when is the last time she talked to herself? B) This lady must be really confused C) Where is the candy isle?! Do you see how this could be problematic for a small child who was adopted? Children think in very concrete terms. When you say "MOM", Mylah is always going to think of me. By using positive adoption language, you can help families like ours. Please choose to use positive adoption language, instead of the more negative words that perpetuate the myth that adoption is second best. For example, birth mom is appropriate because it explains a woman who gave birth to a child, but is not raising him/her.
Here are some positive and negative words frequently used when speaking of adoption:
POSITIVE:
1) Birth Parent
I want Mylah to grow up confident in the family she's in...and confident in the skin she's in. Adoption will play a big role in her life, but it shouldn't define her. She is not "our adopted child", she is simply "our child". When I speak of Brennan and Ivey I don't say, "Brennan, my biological child....". It's the same with adopted children. We should not refer to them as the adopted child when speaking of them. Most of them know they are adopted, just as bio. children know they are bio. We do not need to clarify this when speaking of them. Now, this changes a bit when speaking to strangers about our family. Like at church, we may meet someone new who is curious about how our family was formed. I don't mind at all "defining" my children in these moments, because it is done to educate someone about adoption and how it has blessed our family. Of course during a time like that I may say something like "We adopted Mylah as an infant through private domestic adoption". Let me give an example of something that would be offensive to an adopted child though. Let's say you are a friend of mine and my family is at your child's birthday party. You are introducing us to another family. Please never say something like, "This is Danny, Amber, Brennan, Ivey, and their adopted daughter Mylah". You wouldn't point out that Brennan and Ivey are bio. Most people are going to get it by just looking at us....I mean look at us! LOL They can ask questions, and I don't mind answering about how one of our children looks so much different from us. It's just not polite to label an adopted child when introducing them.
Adoption is by no means second best.The way we talk-and the words we choose-say alot about what we think and value. Family ties formed by adoption are no "less real" than those formed by blood. For example, Brennan and Ivey are not MORE sisters just because they share the same DNA. Mylah is just as equally Brennan's sister as Ivey is. Biology is a great connection too, it's just not what makes them sisters. Biology just comes in handy if you need a kidney or something like that! My kids are just my kids. One is not better than the other because she is biological and not adopted. Adoption is a way to build a family, just as birth is. Both are important, but one is not more important than the other.
I AM Mylah's mommy :) We are her FOREVER FAMILY. She is not borrowed, not on loan, and not going back to her birth mom. She was not stolen or taken, but instead, lovingly placed in our family by a precious woman. A woman who for her own valid reasons, chose me to be Mylah's mommy. "T" and I spent 3 nights and 4 days together at the time of Mylah's birth. She told me over and over again things like "You feed her, you're her mom"..."You change her, you are her mom", and when the birth certificate lady came "T" said "You tell her the name you want on the paperwork, you are her mom." If "T" were here right now and you asked her "Who is Mylah's mom?" She would tell you, without hesitation, that it is me. I know this because "T" and I talk frequently and we have a great relationship. "T" would also tell you that she is Mylah's birth mom. "T" has 3 children that she is parenting. She knows how tough a mom's job is, and she knows what makes a mom. "T" was adopted herself, and will be the 1st to tell you that DNA is not what makes a mommy and daddy. So often I hear things like..."Have you talked to Mylah's mom lately?" or, "I saw the pics of Mylah's mom on your blog, that is so sweet". I try to gently correct by saying "Oh yeah, I talked to her birth mom last week and she is doing well". But, the terminology never seems to stick. If you spend one day with me and Mylah you will see that I am 100% her mom, regardless of who birthed her. She calls me "MaMa", and it's one of the sweetest things I've ever heard! :) If you hold a picture up of "T" and one of me and ask Brennan or Ivey..."Point to Mylah's mom" they will point to me without even having to think about it. Mommies wipe noses, dry tears, get up at all hours of the night to feed or change a diaper, worry about their kids when they are sick, go to Dr. visits, ect....I am the only woman who does all this and more for Mylah. I am her mom.
I have a biological father out there, somewhere! Lord only knows where! Is he my father? My dad? Just because we share DNA? Absolutely not! I have had no relationship with him since I was three years old. He's never even sent me a birthday card, probably doesn't even remember what day I was born. I don't have a "dad". I have a step-father whom I call by his first name "George". He loves me, and I love him...but he is not my dad. He didn't come into my life until I was in High School. I guess I was just a little old to feel like I needed a dad at that point, so he was simply "George". I guess that's sortof the way I see Mylah's relationship with her birthmom going. I think they will love one another, but she will simply be "T"...not mom. Mom or dad is someone who raises you, and shares your life with you on a daily basis...not just occassionally.
Now, pretend for a minute that YOU are Mylah. You are 3, 4, 5 years old (something like that). You are at the grocery store. Along comes Sally, (who apparently didn't read this post! LOL). Sally says to me,"When is the last time you talked to Mylah's mom?" Now, what is Mylah thinking? A) Who is this weird lady asking my mom when is the last time she talked to herself? B) This lady must be really confused C) Where is the candy isle?! Do you see how this could be problematic for a small child who was adopted? Children think in very concrete terms. When you say "MOM", Mylah is always going to think of me. By using positive adoption language, you can help families like ours. Please choose to use positive adoption language, instead of the more negative words that perpetuate the myth that adoption is second best. For example, birth mom is appropriate because it explains a woman who gave birth to a child, but is not raising him/her.
Here are some positive and negative words frequently used when speaking of adoption:
POSITIVE:
1) Birth Parent
2) Biological Parent
3) Their Child
4) Birth father/Bio. Father
5) Make an adoption plan
6) Parent
***I tried to line the columns up side by side but it did not work!
NEGATIVE:
1) Real Parent
2) Natural Parent
3) Adopted Child
4) Real Father
5) Give away, give up
6) Adoptive Parent
Please don't think to yourself "Oh Lord....she was talking about me when she wrote all this!" The truth is, that I am talking about 90% of the people who are reading this...not just you! LOL I am just asking you all to please try....for the sake of Mylah's self confidence in knowing where and to whom she belongs.
BLESSINGS~
Amber
Monday, March 1, 2010
9 MONTH UPDATE
Mylah is 9 months today and keeping me VERY busy! Which is why I only have a second to do a quick post. She is a little over 19 pounds! She is crawling all over the house, and is still doing mostly a military crawl! She has 2 teeth that are peeping through the gum. She can say "Da Da", "Hey" (which she hasn't said lately...sometimes babies "drop" old words and focus on new ones), "Ma-Ma", and her new favorite "Uh-Oh!". She can also wave bye-bye, but doesn't say it yet. She can drink out of a sippy cup...Yay! But there is only 1 cup that she has mastered so far. It is Nuk cup made for beginners. One of her new talents, which I am not pleased about, is her ability to throw the biggest baby tantrums ever! She throws major fits now when she doesn't get her way. She is also learning to push our buttons so to speak! LOL It is amazing how quick they learn these behaviors! She loves to unsnap her diaper over and over as you are trying to put it on or get her dressed. The more you try to correct her or tell her "No", the harder she tries! She loves to kick her feet and slap at you in fits of baby rage! Most of the time it doesn't hurt, thank goodness. But, occasionally she will get a really good punch in!
She is finally sleeping better! :) Thanks to her pulmonologist, she is no longer coughing at night! We never thought the coughing would go away! She still usually ends up in bed with us at some time in the middle of the night. She goes 9-10 hours at night without a bottle now.
She has finally entered my favorite stage of baby-hood! The first 8 months have never been my favorite with any of our girls. I have always loved that magical 9 month and up age. She is doing so much and learning so much! Babies are so much fun when they start talking more and getting around on their own. It is a little harder to watch her, since she goes anywhere she pleases now. But, at least I don't have her on my hip quite as much! :)
One of her favorite real food treats is pizza crusts! She loves to eat our crusts, and it's not very messy for her either! The perfect teething food! She also loves to share popsicle's with Ivey. Ivey sneaks them for her and Mylah all the time! What are big sisters for, right?!
Monday, February 15, 2010
SNOW DAY! 2010
It actually snowed here! I am still in shock! That happens about every 10-20 years here in the south! We live very, very south! Like near the ocean and beaches. We NEVER see snow! The kids were so excited! This happened on Friday, Feb. 12th. All of you people from the North are probably laughing at my pics of "snow"! You may call this a dusting, but for us it was SNOW! Schools in the area were all closed down for the snow storm! LOL The girls were so happy! :) Anyway, just had to show you all some pics of a pretty miraculous event here on the Gulf Coast!
Blessings!~
Amber
VALENTINE'S DAY~MARDI GRAS!!!
It's my party and I'll cry if I want to!!!
Valentine's Day this year was so much fun...not very romantic, but fun! Brennan is off on a cruise to Mexico, with her grandmother! Lucky her!!! Danny and I took the two little ones to a Mardi Gras parade! Mylah seemed excited, even though she didn't have a clue what was going on! Ivey was in moon pie heaven! She got tons of beads, moon pies (YUMMY!), and two stuffed animals! Ivey never meets a stranger, and ended up latching onto a married couple that had their two teen daughters with them. The couple ate up having a little one around and were spoiling Ivey rotten! They kept giving her all their goodies they caught. They also put her up on their shoulders so she could get more loot! Ivey got hit in the face really hard with some beads though. :( Some of those guys just throw way too hard! I posted a pic of her injury. Not sure if you can see it or not though. Each bead left an imprint on her face for a few hours! OUCH!!! I also posted a pic of Mylah's cute Valentine hair do! So, yes....we spent our Valentine's day at a huge party with a bunch of drunks! And no, we didn't get to have a single drink! LOL I know many of my readers have never experienced Mardi Gras. It is a HUGE deal in our town though! If any of you ever get the chance, go to a town that celebrates Mardi Gras sometime...you won't be sorry! People come from all over to experience this fun event! We are one of the few lucky towns that have 2 straight weeks of partying and parades! The kids even get out of school for several days to celebrate! No, I'm not kidding! We sometimes use the Mardi Gras break to go to Disney or some other fun place. We are not big party people anymore, so we just don't do the parades every year. I am glad we went this year though...much fun!
Love~
Amber
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