HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRENNAN!!!

First let me start this post by saying HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRENNAN! I can't believe my oldest daughter turned 10 today! I have been a mom for 10 years! It has been the best 10 years of my life! I LOVE being a mom and am so thankful that God has given me the honor to raise these 3 girls. It is very tough at times, and I stay exhausted...but I wouldn't trade it for anything! And yes, I would do it all over again in a heartbeat! Brennan is such a sweet girl! She loves to help me with Mylah by playing with her and feeding her bottles. She is also good a putting her to sleep! Mylah sometimes falls asleep in Brennan's arms at night while Brennan is watching TV. This helps Danny and I do story time with Ivey and get her into bed!

Brennan has already had her birthday bash with her friends. She had a sleepover and we took them all to Paint that Pottery! It was alot of fun! I baked cupcakes for her to take to school today. Tonight we are going to eat pizza, then take our 3 girls to see PRINCESS AND THE FROG!!! I can't wait to see that movie! We are also going to pig out on popcorn & candy and pray that no one gets a belly ache! LOL

Mylah liked the Judge! Our attorney is in the green scarf

We finalized the adoption of Mylah on December 4th!!! A day we will never forget...a day that will forever be very important for us! We are now legally a FOREVER FAMILY! The ceremony was very nice. The judge gave us about a 5-10 minute speech (which was very nice) that included reasons why he feels adoption is so important and special. He talked about what Mylah may be when she grows up, ect... He was a really nice guy! Our attorney met us there early that morning. We were also met by two women who are part of a Post Adoption Connection group here in town. We did not know they would be there. Apparently they are notified when an adoption is being finalized and they try to meet all families there. They gave us some advice on post adoption resources. They also gave each of our 3 girls a teddy bear, which was really sweet! My mother also went with us! The ceremony only took about 20 minutes. Believe it or not, there were NO papers for us to sign! I found this really odd. I expected to have at least something to sign! LOL We have done nothing but sign our lives away the past 2 years it seems like! Then, on this most important day...nothing to sign! I still can't believe it! You go to court and have nothing to sign! I hope they know what they are doing! LOL Now we just wait on more info from our attorney. She will send us the paperwork to finally get Mylah a birth certificate and SS card! We are so grateful that we were able to finalize before the end of the year!

Peace and Blessings~

Amber

Mylah Meets Santa!!!

We've had a super busy month....with lots more fun to be had! I still need to post about our finalization which happened on December 4th! But for right now, I'm just going to leave you with a pic of the girls with Santa! And a few other random Christmas pics! Check out Mylah's "Santa Rocks" shirt! :)

FAMILY PICTURES!

I am so happy that we are a family of 5 this year! As I was wrapping a few gifts the other night, it reminded me of how this time last year I was praying we would have our newest edition by next Christmas. It seems like every time a holiday or special day passed, I would think "maybe by this time next year..." As I wrapped one of Mylah's gifts the other night, I sat and thought~I can't believe I am actually wrapping gifts for our baby! Even though she is almost 6 months old, I still sit in awe over how blessed we are to have her in our lives. We finalize in court VERY soon, and I can't wait for the day when Mylah will have our last name!

So, we took our first professional pics as a family of 5! I dreaded getting them done, b/c I figured there would be no way to get a decent photo of all of us in one pic! The more people you add to a picture, the harder it gets to obtain a good shot! It went way better than expected though, and we have a good family pic to send out this year!

We have our tree decorated, and even a few gifts under it! We are all getting very excited about Christmas! My favorite time of the year, as we celebrate the birth of Christ and all of our blessings!

Peace and love~

Amber

Mylah's New Trick!

Mylah has learned a new trick that mommy does not like so much! She, however, thinks it is great! The bumbo seat is no longer my sanity keeper...she escapes it every time! She began doing this about a week ago. She falls right on her head and thinks it's the funniest thing ever! Sometimes the bumbo gets stuck to her bottom, and sometimes it just stays upright. Either way, she is always splat on her tummy on the floor. These are pics of the first day she learned her new trick. She was on my bed the first time she did this. I was in my bathroom getting ready. I came out and the bumbo was sitting upright, but had no Mylah in it! Scared me to death at first glance. Luckily she did not fall off the bed. I put her right back in it and thought it was just a fluke that she got out. She got right back out of it! Then I grabbed the camera and took pics! :) I used to put her on the table, beds, countertops, and all sorts of high places in her bumbo. I can now only put her on the carpeted floors. I can't believe she is just 5 months old and is already acting like Houdini! I think we may have another "Ivey" on our hands...dear Lord help us!

I spoke to "T" today. She finally got the package I sent with a scrapbook of Mylah! "T" asked to see pics a few weeks ago. Before this time, she was not ready. I made a nice scrapbook, and got her a DVD of Mylah's Baptism. I sent the package off, and about 5 or 6 days later it showed back up at MY door! I was not happy :( The post office didn't know what happened and still can't explain it. They sent it again free of charge, and it finally made it to "T"!! She was so excited and called me on the phone as she was looking at the photos. She loved all that I sent, and is still very much at peace with placing Mylah with our family. That makes me so happy! I never want "T" to have regrets about this. I was worried that she would be sad seeing pics of her. She was very upbeat though, and said she knows Mylah is very loved. We had a great conversation! I enjoyed hearing her talk about Mylah's features and hearing who's eyes, chin, ect... that she has. I bet "T" looked at the photos a million times tonight! :) She also shared the book with Mylah's birth siblings and they were saying things like "Is that our sister?" I am so glad "T" shares with them the truth about Mylah's adoption story. I always want Mylah to think of "T's" kids as her siblings, and I'm glad "T" is teaching her 3 children to cherish Mylah in that way as well! I hope all 6 of our children will grow to have relationships with one another. Brennan is already very interested in "T's" kids and she talks about them and asks questions about them often. She can't wait to meet them! This should happen in Feb. if all goes as planned.

Here are some pictures of Mylah in her Baptism gown! I finally got around to getting them done...2 months AFTER her Baptism! LOL It is soooo busy with 3 kids! I do not want to start slacking on the photos of her though. Many people do this when they have 3 or more children. The more children they have, the less photos they have of the youngest kids. I can easily see how that happens. Time just ticks away so quickly and quietly when you are rushing around taking care of everyone and just living life! I do not ever want to neglect capturing these special times for Mylah though. I take lots of photos of all my kids at home! Too many probably! But, I also want to take her for professional pics as often as I did for my first two daughters. This is proving to be quite challenging! I may stay a couple months behind on getting Mylah's done, but they WILL get done! I am determined! LOL

Peace~ Amber

CONTACT!

I finally heard from "T"!!! She sent me a text from a new phone number on Sunday night, Nov. 1st. We sent a couple of texts back and forth. She said she was in the process of moving and would call me when she got settled. She ended up calling me a few hours later! I was sooo happy to hear from her. I have been worrying so much about her and Mylah's 3 bio. siblings. It was great to hear her voice! :) She is still in school and is working part-time also. I am so proud of her! She did receive the letters and Bible I sent in the past 2 months. She is extremely busy going to school, working, and raising 3 kids...which I can totally understand! I just hope she doesn't go so long again without contacting me. I don't think she realizes how much I worried about her when we lost touch. Maybe she needed time/space to heal and move forward with her life. I think I will worry less now if she goes without contacting me for a while. I think now I feel more secure in the fact that she will not disappear on us. I never want that to happen! I need her to be part of Mylah's life in some way because I think this will be best for my daughter.
"T" told me she has been in contact with Mylah's birth father. They did not speak for most of her pregnancy, and just recently started talking again. He has been seeing Mylah's 3 bio. siblings some on the weekends. I am glad he is trying to do right by those kids, because I know they were devastated when he walked out of their lives. "S" (Mylah's birth father) and "T" had alot to talk about regarding Mylah's birth and adoption. They have worked things out the best that they can for the sake of the children. I am so glad that he is there for his kids, and that he is trying to be a good dad. "T" has not asked to see pictures of Mylah, and I have always told her I will send them if she ever wants to. She finally told me on Sunday that she is ready to see pictures of her and she is curious to see who she looks like. She also said that "S" wants to see them as well. I will be sending some to her very soon! I told her to please send me some pics of her, "S", and the children so that I can save them for Mylah. I hope to make her an album of her birth family and be able to add to it as the years go by.
"T" told me some bad news about "S". He has recently been diagnosed with Cancer. He is only 28 years old. She said she does not know what type it is. She said the doctors think he has had it for years! He was in the hospital in May for a month, which is when he was diagnosed. I hope to find out more about his condition. "T" did not seem to know much about it at all. I told her that we need to learn all we can about it because there are 4 children that may need this information one day. Please, please keep "S" in your prayers. I am praying for him to be healed so that he can be there for his 3 children, and so that someday Mylah can meet him as well. He has 3 babies who need him and they are so young still. They are only 5 yrs, 3 yrs, and 1 year old...they need time to make many fun, loving memories with their dad.

HAPPY FALL YA'LL!!! :)

It's been a really long time since I have posted anything! October has been crazy busy! I think it is even going to top December this year as far as all the activities we have had going on. I am ready to say GOODBYE to October! But not before celebrating Danny's birthday, which happens to be on Halloween!

Mylah is doing great still! We have been so blessed that she has not been sick or ever ran fever! She has had a stuffy nose and that's it! The crazy weather can probably be blamed for that. We have all had some sinus issues! You may wake up here on the Coast in the Fall and it will be in the 40's...then by lunchtime it's 80! Seriously! Mylah had her 4 month check up around 18 weeks (4 1/2 months). Danny took her for that visit all by himself! I was sooo tired from working the night before. He took off work and took her b/c it was really not safe for me to be driving that day! He got a prescription for her exzema, which we have only had to use on her a few times in just a couple of very small areas. We had pretty much already gotten her skin issues under control on our own. The skin care regime is tiring, but seems to be working. You would not believe how much time is spent moisturizing this child!

At her check up she weighed 14 lb 2 oz and was 24 1/2 inches long! She is growing like crazy! I can't believe how quickly she has grown! She is adjusting to her baby food more and more, but still prefers to just be fed a bottle. She has tried an assortment of fruits, but no veggies yet. If she doesn't care for the fruits all that much, I am really dreading introducing the veggies! She must take after Ivey! I usually only feed her the fruit/cereal mixture a few times a week...I really need to get more consistent and do it once a day!

She is full of personality and is smiling ALL the time! I posted some new pics of her gorgeous smile! :) I also attempted to do her hair in a "style" ONE time! There is a pic of that here too, it turned out pretty cute. Her hair is really not long enough to do anything with yet. She did not appreciate my efforts much, and pulled one pony-tail "pom-pom" out as soon as I turned my back! She is quick! Brennan had to hold her hands and distract her while I did her hair, luckily it only took about 5 minutes. I also included a pic of our trip to the pumpkin patch at our church. Mylah wore a witch costume that Ivey wore when she was that age.

One a sad note, I have lost contact with "T". I worry about her EVERY single day. I think it's been about 10 weeks since I spoke with her. I call her once a week, but her phone is disconnected. I have written also, but have not heard anything back. I don't even know if she is still at the same address. I hope to hear from her. Please pray for her and her 3 children. I hope they are okay. Maybe she needs some space right now, to move on with her life. Or, maybe her life is SOOO difficult right now that the last thing on her mind is contacting me. We are going to Atlanta in Feb. and we are still hoping to spend some time with her then.

Our adoption of Mylah is still not finalized. Our attorney in Mobile is working on her paperwork now. She should have it completed soon. Then we just wait on a court date. We are hoping to finalize in November, which is National Adoption Month!

Hope you all have a safe, fun Halloween! I plan on eating lots of candy and Birthday cake!

Blessings~Amber

MYLAH'S BAPTISM SEPT. 6, 2009

Ivey called Mylah's dress her "mermaid dress" because it's so long!

Me and Mylah at our home during her Baptism reception!

Mylah's pretty cake! We had lots of food and fun!

On Sunday, the 6th of September, we dedicated Mylah to our Lord and Savior! We had the most wonderful church service that day. The pastor's sermon was awesome, and so was the music! We attend a very upbeat church service called New Song at a United Methodist Church. We had many family members and friends in attendance for Mylah's special day! Danny wrote some very special words of his own which he read to the congregation. It was very touching and I was in tears. I am surprised I was not a sobbing mess! It was hard for me to hold it together. It was also a very emotional day for us because it was "T's" birthday! I am so glad her birthday happened to fall on a Sunday, and that we were able to get Mylah baptized on a VERY special day! Yesterday was also Communion Sunday (the 1st Sunday of every month). They never do Baptism's on Communion day, but I am so thankful to our pastor for making special arrangements to Baptize Mylah on "T's" birthday.

After the service everyone came back to our house for a reception. We had more food than we could eat! We had a great time visiting with friends and family that we often don't get to spend enough time with! I wanted to share with you all what Danny wrote for Mylah's Baptism.

A Dedication Of Mylah to the Lord Jesus

Years ago our family embarked on a journey for a child we named Mylah Brooke. We did not know where she was, or when we would be with her. But we knew eventually the Lord would bless us with her. We started on this journey not knowing where the Lord would lead us. The journey to Mylah was long and arduous. But we knew the Lord would lead us in the right direction. There were many road blocks that we encountered, and all of them I believe were set forth by the Lord for a reason.

We prayed every night for Him to lead us in the path he wanted us to take. There were so many paths. Many of these paths seemed promising, however they were empty. After each empty path we took or considered taking; surprisingly our hearts began to open wider and wider. Only after we fully opened our hearts to Jesus is when the right path appeared before us. It was not long after taking the right path that Jesus led us to Mylah Brooke.

So today, we dedicate you Mylah Brooke to Jesus; and just as Jesus led us to you, so shall we lead you to Him. We promise to raise you Mylah in a loving, faithful, Christian family that will sculpt and define an unbreakable relationship with Jesus Christ our Lord.

We would also like to extend a blessing to Mylah's Birth mom and her 3 children. Today is her birthday and so it is a special day for her as well. So let today also be a wonderful birthday gift to her, as we dedicate Mylah to Jesus and thank the Lord for bringing our 2 families together.

AMEN

Okay, now I'm in tears once again! Blessings~Amber

Mylah's First Body Piercing! LOL

Mylah got her ears pierced on Sunday after church! We were supposed to go swimming, but unfortunately for Mylah the weather was ugly! Instead of a relaxing day outdoors the poor child ended up with two new holes in her body! Hopefully this will be the last of any additional holes in her body! But...if she takes after her mommy, then there are more piercings to come in her future! The lady doing her ears messed up on one and had to redo it...I was not real happy about that. Poor Mylah! Brennan and Ivey were both 4 years old when they had theirs done. It was so fun taking them and seeing how proud they were of their new earrings. They would show everyone and they felt like "big girls". It was a day I think they will both sortof remember. That is the only bad thing about getting them done on baby girls. That "I'm a big, brave girl" moment is stolen from them. Mylah does look super cute with her earrings though! Cleaning them 2-3 times a day is a whole other issue! It's like cleaning 2 tiny holes on an octopus! Hands and feet and head swinging every which way. And if someone tries to hold her head still then she just gets more wild! I am going to need several more bottles of the cleaning stuff b/c this one has mostly ended up in her hair, neck, and inside her ears....everywhere but the tiny holes! Brennan and Ivey love Mylah's new "diamonds"! They were so excited to take her for earrings, but they felt bad when she cried. Mylah calmed down as soon as I put the paci in her mouth, which made us all feel better!

Blessings and Peace!

~Amber

2 Month Check Up!

Mylah was 4 weeks old here. Don't let the pic fool you...she was cranky for this photo shoot! We got 2 good shots of her that day and they look great!

4 weeks here too...taken the same day. Our Social Worker made this beautiful dress for her! We are blessed with an awesome SW!

Mylah got nasty eating cereal with a spoon for the first time! We had so much fun feeding her!

Mylah had her two month check up on Tuesday the 11th! She was 10 weeks old at the visit and weighed 10 pounds 11 ounces! I delayed her 2 month check up a little while because she had been congested, and coughing. She never ran any fever but we all had a summer cold. Her check up went great. She has been rolling over from stomach to back for several weeks now. She loves to smile and talk alot! She is a happy baby and mostly just cries when she is hungry.

We all survived the first week back to school. Brennan is in 4th grade this year and Ivey started kindergarten! Of course, Mylah always wants to eat when it is time to get the girls ready for school! She also loves to eat in the car pool line! Murphy's law I guess...babies always want to eat at the most inconvenient times! I think I fed her in the car pool line 4 out of the 5 days this week while picking up the girls! We are all adjusting to the routine and the week actually went smoother than I expected it to.

I finally got around to ordering Mylah's adoption/birth announcements and her Baptism invitations! They look great and I am so excited! They just came in the mail today and I need to get them out ASAP! Mylah will be Baptized on Sept. 6th which is also her bmoms birthdate. I thought it would be special for Mylah someday to be Baptized on this special day.

Mylah had cereal and baby food mixed together tonight for the first time! She ate it off the spoon like a champ and did really well! We video taped it and she was a mess...I forgot how messy babies are when they eat with a spoon! I fed her right AFTER her bath...probably not real smart! She cried when I first started feeding her because she was really hungry and was wanting her after bath bottle! She finally figured out it was getting in her tummy and then she really liked it. After she finished she was smiling and talking for about 30 minutes! Now, if she would just start sleeping through the night! LOL She still eats every four hours, which isn't really that bad. I have put cereal in her bedtime bottles for the past 3 nights, but it hasn't made her sleep any longer. :( Oh Well...it will come soon enough. Danny and I stay pretty tired, but these 3 girls bring us so much joy! We wouldn't trade it for anything! I have sooo many pics of Danny falling asleep with Mylah in his arms...it is hilarious! It is now a contest I have with myself to see how many pics like this I end up with! No wonder that baby is sooo spoiled!

Peace~ Amber

4TH OF JULY!

We had an awesome 4th of July weekend! We went to Perdido Key to stay at my parents condo. We enjoy going there alot in the summers, but have not been able to go yet this year. The girls have really missed it and were so happy to be there! They have many friends that live in the condos that they enjoy playing with in the summer. We shot fireworks, cooked out, ate watermelon, took boat rides, roasted marshmallows on the beach and had a blast!!! The weather was beautiful! It was Mylah's first of many beach trips! She got to wear her festive bikini which was super cute on her! She stayed cool in the shade most of the time with a fan blowing on her! She didn't even mind the loud fireworks...but Brennan and Ivey plugged their ears (like always)! Our relaxing weekend went by much too quickly!

Blessings~Amber

DIAPER BAG!!!

I ordered Mylah the cutest diaper bag! I included a pic here for you all to see. I was so excited to get it! I have been carrying the hospital issued black boring diaper bag for 5 weeks now...Uggg! I always quit carrying a purse when I have an infant because that is just too much to keep up with. I just throw my wallet, cell phone and any other necessities in the diaper bag. I guess that is why I always like to be sure I have a cute diaper bag! If that is the only handbag I get to carry for a while, then it might as well be something that's cute and original!

If any of you are looking for a cute handbag, feel free to contact Wendy. She lives here in Alabama, but will pretty much ship anywhere! She custom makes the bags with whatever colors, ect... you choose. She can make bags for boys or girls. There are many details that you can't see in my pic. The bag has many pockets and closes with a zipper. It usually takes her 2 weeks to do the bags. Here is the link to her website:

http://www.satindollhandbags.com/ She is a super sweet lady...I got to meet her when I picked up Mylah's bag! She is good about communicating with you to be sure the bag is just how you want it. She also makes purses, you should check out her website! ~Amber

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!

GO-GO GADGET STROLLER!!!!

I wanted to do a quick post to wish my wonderful hubby and all the other fathers out there a Happy Fathers Day!! This is Danny's first father's day with 3 children! He loves all his girls so much! :) We had a relaxing day at home. He entertained and took care of the girls while I did some cleaning! We have our 1st post placement visit tomorrow with our Social Worker. I am also taking classes at work this coming week. I usually work 2 nights/week...but this week I will be there M-F 8a-4p. Ugggggggggggg!!!! I am going to miss the girls! Danny is taking the week off to stay with them b/c I really need to get these classes out of the way.

We have been staying busy with the kids. I have been trying to keep Brennan and Ivey's summer full of fun and sun! We have been going to the swim club a good bit. It is too hot to do anything else, and the girls love being outdoors. I can't let them play out right now unless they are in the water! Mylah does really well at the pool. She actually seems to really like being outside. She loves noisy places and sleeps best with chaos around her! She loves to sleep at the girls cheer practice and the swim club. I keep her cool at the pool! I have come up with a Go-Go Gadget Stroller which is awesome! She has a clip on umbrella for constant shade. She also has her very own battery operated clip on fan. And I spray her with a water bottle about every 20-30 minutes! At first she hated being sprayed, but now she sleeps right through it! She will squirm a little...then I guess she's just like "Oh..it's that water stuff again!" I spray her head, arms, legs, and the chest and back section of her onsie. I soak her onsie pretty good and just keep her diaper area dry. With her being wet and a fan blowing on her constantly, she stays nice and cool! Everyone is always stopping to admire her go-go gadgets!!! I have included a pic of her funny looking stroller for your amusement!

PEACE~Amber

TRIPLE BLESSINGS!!!

Sorry don't know why this pic is upside down! We barely made it out of the car before they swarmed!

Brennan's 1st time feeding her!

Love at first sight!

In a few short hours it will be mine and Danny's 12 year anniversary! I can't believe how many wonderful things these 12 years have given us. We have an awesome marriage and 3 wonderful little girls! I can't wait to see what 12 more years will have in store for us.

Mylah and I got home on June 11th which was Thursday. It only took our attorneys, social workers, ect...10 days to get us home from Ga. Not too bad! I have of course been very busy since we came home. I will be going back to work in another week, I decided I need next week off b/c Mylah and Brennan both have doctors appointments. Also, Brennan has VBS. And I don't think I will ever catch up with bills, laundry, housework and grocery shopping! There are just not enough hours in each day! LOL My mom stayed with Mylah on Friday while I took Brennan and Ivey swimming. It was nice to spend time with them after being gone so long. Me and Bren went shopping today and left Danny home with the 2 little ones. Brennan and I had a good time, but I think Danny was relieved when we returned! LOL Mylah likes to give him a hard time occasionally! And Ivey, well... she's just hyper and loud all the time! :) I read 3 stories to Ivey at bedtime tonight, and I am just trying to give each of them some time with me right now. Which by the way is not easy! Babies take up alot of time though, and the summer will fly by. Brennan and Ivey will soon be gone everyday to school, so I really want to do the best I can to spend time with them and make their summer fun!

I have still talked to "T" each day so far. She is still doing well, but was under the weather for a few days. Her and 2 of the kids had a virus and she also ended up with a UTI! She just can't get a break lately! They are all feeling better now thought. She is still looking into Jr. College. She is now considering Nursing or Surgical Tech school. I'm sure our contact will decrease once she gets busy with school and working. I am just thankful that she plans on remaining in our lives and Mylah's.

I hope you all like the pics of all the girls together. Brennan and Ivey just can't get enough of their little sister! Mylah has also had the pleasure of meeting her "NaNa" (Danny's mom) and "BeBe" (my mom) and her Aunt Donna (Danny's sister). They all adore her!

DIFFICULT DAYS...

CHECK OUT HER BIRTHMARK...SO CUTE!

These last few days have been pretty tough. Danny left on Sunday, which was pretty depressing for me. Then I called "T" that afternoon and she wasn't doing so good. She was feeling really depressed. She had 2 of her friends say some really nasty things to her about placing her baby for adoption. I am not going into all the detail here, but it was really terrible, heart breaking. As of now she hasn't had anymore contact with these two people and is realizing they were never true friends to begin with. I will add one more thing about the 2 of them, neither can have children. Or at least they haven't been able to so far. They both wanted this baby once they knew "T" was making an adoption plan. "T" thinks they stuck by her side during the pregnancy b/c they were holding out hope that she would let one of them raise her. Neither of these women are in any better shape than "T" is as far as finances go. Neither are married or in a stable, healthy relationship. They probably would have not made it past the homestudy even if "T" would have wanted to place the baby with one of them. "T" thinks they are really just upset that she chose "strangers" to adopt Mylah and not one of them. I could go into more detail of things, but that is enough...you get the picture. Anyway, the things they said made "T" have feelings of guilt. The words they said echoed in her head and she was very sad. We talked for a while. I told her that I didn't want her to feel like she had been forced into anything. I also told her that we love Mylah, but at the same time we would not be able to live our lives in peace raising her if we knew that "T" had doubts or was unsure about her decision. I told her we needed to know she was at peace. I let her know that I would not hold any bad feelings toward her if things didn't work out. It killed me to say these things. I meant them, but I also worried that by telling her she just might really change her mind. I called Danny that night and told him about my conversation with "T". We were both very upset and worried. I was surprised that I actually slept pretty well that night. I decided that it was all out of my hands and I just had to trust that things would work out the way they were supposed to. I prayed that God would just let things happen as He planned. I went to bed trying not to lose sight of my faith.

The next morning, I called "T" to see how she was feeling. She was doing much better. She said she stayed up much of the night praying about her situation. She said that she decided she was done with these 2 friends and that she wasn't going to let them make her second guess herself. She said she thought long and hard about adoption while she was pregnant. She said she knew she made the choice that was right for her and all of her children, including Mylah. We talked for several hours and she talked alot about her plans to improve her life.

Today was the last day for "T" to revoke the adoption. I called her to check on her and see if she was having any doubts. She was not. She said she called a counselor at the junior college and was looking into doing their 2 year nursing program. She said she would like to be a nurse on the post partum floor. She said she would enjoy helping women recover after childbirth. Plus she could try to make a more positive environment for women who decide to make a plan to place their baby for adoption.

"T" also talked to me about how she wants our relationship to go from here. She would like for us to start decreasing our contact some. She doesn't want me to keep worrying about her and the children. She told me that Mylah is my daughter and she just wants me to take her home and enjoy her and get on with my life. I made her promise to keep me informed over the next few months about how she is doing b/c I want to be sure she is going to be okay. I told her to let me know how her plans for work and possibly college work out. She said she would. She basically wants us to have contact about every 3-4 months. I told her to let me know when she is ready to get pics of Mylah and I will be glad to send them to her. She knows we will be in Atlanta in Feb. for a cheer competition and she thinks she may want to see us then. I am going to miss talking to her and I know I will worry about her alot. She said she will write to me every now and then and send pics of her and the kids. This hotel is probably going to charge me extra for all the kleenex I've used!!

On a lighter note...after talking to "T" I decided I had to get outdoors somehow! I have been either in a hospital or this hotel room since last Monday!! Me and Mylah went to the pool. She was good and allowed me to tan while she sat in the shade. We were only out for about an hour and a half but it did me lots of good to be out in the sun! Plus, Mylah wants her mommy to be tan like her! I posted new pics at the beginning of this post...She has a dimple on her left cheek which I love, and I also love how her eyes are sortof asian looking!

Goodnight!~Amber

Mylah's 1st Bath!

This is a pic. of Mylah when we were getting ready to do her 1st bath. This was taken at the hotel tonight! She has this look on her face like "Oh God, what are they about to do now?!"

Speaking of the bath, I knew her hair was curly but after her bath I was like OMG! Her hair is soooo curly! We are in trouble!

Goodnight!~Amber

THE HOSPITAL AND MORE...

We made it to the hotel this afternoon! I know some of you wanted to know a little about what went on while we were at the hospital. I thought I would try to do a post tonight about some of our experience. It went quite a bit different than what I thought it would be like. "T" had said before Mylah was born that she didn't want her to stay in the nursery alone. "T" wanted her to mostly stay in the room with us and have me take care of her there. You have to be really flexible with adoption, and you never really know how the bmom is going to feel when the time really comes. It turned out that "T" ended up not really wanting to see Mylah much. I know it was just too painful for her. Not only that, but "T" was in alot of pain. She had some complications due to the fact that this was her 3rd c-section, and the last one was only 11 months ago. She also had her tubes tied, which adds to the pain. I was really worried about her and was even nervous that they may have to take her back into surgery. I almost hate to admit this, but I felt guilty when I went to see Mylah in the nursery. I went to feed her several times, but didn't stay long at all. I really wanted to love on her and hold her, but I knew that "T" had no one but me to lean on. I stayed in "T's" room the whole time, and never left the hospital. I am really glad that we got to spend that time together though. I will be with Mylah for the rest of our lives, but I only had a short time to get to know her bmom. Mylah only came to the room with us for about 30 minutes while the photographer took her newborn photo. They don't take the newborn photo in the nursery, and made us bring her to the room. It was too much for "T". She only stayed a few minutes and then left to walk the halls. I felt so bad for her. Before Mylah got to the room I showed "T" 3 outfits I brought for the photo. I asked her to pick which one she wanted Mylah to wear for the picture. She had no problem doing this, and actually enjoyed it. She didn't have any problems talking about Mylah, or us raising her. She just couldn't look at her much or be around her. I was really glad she picked the outfit for the photo though. The only other time Mylah came to her room was today. "T" surprised me this morning and said I could go get her from the nursery and bring her to the room so she could hold her before we all left. I was sooo glad she wanted to see her. I never wanted her to regret not holding Mylah in the hospital, yet I didn't want to force the issue either and make her uncomfortable. We only had her in the room with us for about 30 minutes before the attorney and social workers showed up, but it was an awesome time that I will never forget! I got some really sweet pics of her and Mylah, which I know Mylah will cherish one day.

Let me add a little humor in here real quick since I am very teary eyed right now! "T's" doctor was a really great man. He seemed to be really caring and concerned about her and not in a rush like so many docs today. Anyway, he came in and said a prayer with us all this morning. He happened to come when Mylah was in the room and Danny had just gotten there as well. Anyway, we all held hands for the prayer. I was holding Mylah in my right arm and also holding "T's" hand on that same side. With my left hand I had Danny's hand. So, we are all in a circle over "T's" bed holding hands. "T" is sortof laying down and I am having to lean over to hold her hand, while also holding Mylah on the same arm. The doc starts his prayer. But then, he goes on and on and on! You really wouldn't believe. It was quite commical! It was a very sweet prayer, don't get me wrong. I was really into the prayer at first and really concentrating on his words. But, you just wouldn't believe how long this went on. The postition I was in was terrible. I was like I am going to pass out or possibly drop the baby! "T" even was tired of reaching up to hold my hand and at some point I felt her let go. My arm was shaking from fatigue of holding Mylah so long in that position! I was totally not listening to the last session of the prayer! Instead, I was silently saying my own prayer which went something like this: "Dear Lord, please let this doctor stop praying soon. Doesn't he have any more patients to see? And Lord, please don't let me pass out from hanging my head down so long in this postion. And please don't let me drop the baby or "T" will never let us adopt her. And Dear God is he really still praying?! Please help me!!" My prayer ended, but his did not! I'm telling you, I have never bowed my head that long in prayer! Later we were all talking about how funny it was! "T" said she was also praying for him to stop praying! She was like is he a doctor or a pastor?! I think he missed his calling, but I do appreciate his nice prayer for us all.

We took "T" home from the hospital. It was very emotional for me. She was being very strong. I took her things into her completely empty apartment. I got to hear her neighbors fighting through the walls. She had told me before that they fight violently all the time. They were at it when we got there, and I'm not gonna lie. It was pretty scary. You could hear every word they were saying. I had to make a few trips out to the car and warned Danny about what was going on and to just be on alert. He stayed in the car with Mylah. It was sad to see her have to live like that, and her children have to listen to that violence every single day. "T" said sometimes they go into the furthest room away from the wall of the other peoples apartment b/c she is just waiting on bullets to fly one day. I would be doing the same thing, I was very nervous about it.

"T" doesn't have any furniture at all. Nothing. Our friend that Danny stayed with in Atlanta is a SW there. He is going to get "T" some used furniture for her house. We are all so thankful for that!

"T" and I said our goodbyes and I cried. I left her a small gift in the kitchen for her to open after I left. It was a necklace I ordered for her that is custom made for bmoms. It was a heart with a dagger through it. It has 2 small silver beads and one large pale pink pearl. The 2 silver beads represent the birth-family and the adoptive family and the pearl symbolizes the adopted child. I also left a letter that I had written to her, and a card.

Danny and I finally got to the hotel with Mylah. We then decided to go to Walmart to get some drinks and snacks. I recieved a text from "T" while we were shopping. It was so sweet and said: "Thank u for taking care of me this week. I am so grateful 4 u and Danny. This bed feels great and the gift you gave me was beautiful. I love U." It was all I could do not to break down sobbing in the middle of walmart. The bed she referred to was a blow up mattress we bought for her which Danny went and set up a few days before she went home. She has been sleeping on the floor.

I did not get to meet her kids. They had not made it back to the apartment with her friend before we got there today. I am jealous because Danny did get to meet them! He took the gifts we had for them and the mattress for "T" over there on Monday night. He got to see them playing with the toys we got them and he said they were enjoying themselves. Danny said they are really quiet kids, and very calm. I'm thinking YES...I hope Mylah gets those genes! Our kids are so loud and active that it will be nice to have a mellow one in the bunch! Danny's sleeping and I gotta run feed Mylah. I will do this 11pm feed and he can get up at 2am! LOL

Mylah's Here!!!

Hi all! Sorry it has taken so long for me to update the blog. I know many of you are waiting to see pics! Hopefully I can remember how to post pics! Anyway, things are going well. It is just really busy and I have only had 3 1/2 hours of sleep since I've been here. I stayed in "T's" room last night, and will probably stay with her every night. She and Mylah will be discharged on Thursday, then we will be going to a hotel. Danny stayed at Mitch's house last night and will be staying with him and his wife until we leave Atlanta on Thurs. The photographer is about to take Mylah's newborn photo, so I gotta run!

SHE'S COMING TODAY!!!

"T" called this morning and said her water broke! Of course my life went from lazy morning calm to completely crazy! Danny came right home from work and I was frantically getting dressed and throwing everything in the car. We got the girls to a neighbors because my mom was having to come from Pensacola. We are about an hour or two away from the hospital. I am worried about "T"  because I know how scared she was to think of possibly being alone during surgery. We have no idea what is going on, because by now they have probably taken all of her belongings...  including her cell. I am pretty sure Mylah will be born before we arrive. I will update later today or sometime tonight! 

MY BIRTHDAY

This is going to be a short post, because I am super tired! I had a great birthday today! Me, Danny, Brennan and Ivey went to Dauphin Island. Danny's uncle rented a house there. It was a relaxing day and we had some great food! We also had a little b-day cake, which the kids enjoyed more than I did! LOL Brennan and I also made a special trip to Walmart. We got Ivey a few gifts to open on her birthday. She will be 5 on June 10th! Danny will be home by then, but I will most likely still be in Ga. Danny and Brennan will get a cake for her and she will open the gifts. I will plan a party for her later this summer. I am going to be so sad to not be with her on her b-day!
I talked to "T" tonight and she was washing clothes and getting things ready for her friends who will be taking care of the children. She is excited that the day is almost here. She asked us to come over to her house on Tuesday night if we get into Atlanta early enough. We plan on getting there before 5pm, so we are going to see her and the kids on Tuesday afternoon. I told her we would bring dinner over. We are all excited that we get to meet in a relaxed atmosphere, instead of the morning of the c-section. We will also get to see the kids and play with them, which should be lots of fun. We have a few toys for them to open and I think they will really like what Brennan and Ivey picked out for them! Tomorrow I am going to clean the house and make sure I have everything packed! I can't believe we leave in 2 days! I am excited and a little nervous too. My best friend Jennifer came over tonight. She gave me some wonderful adoption books, and a journal. She also gave Brennan, Ivey and Mylah a gift. She is too sweet and generous! I love her very much! Jen gave Brennan a journal. She told her to write in her journal each day that Danny and I are gone. Brennan is very excited about her special journal. Right when Jen left Brennan took off. I found her laying on the floor in Mylah's room. She was already writing in her journal. She was describing the room to Mylah. She was also telling her how long we have waited for her and how much she can't wait to see her! She is the sweetest child! :) I am going to miss Brennan and Ivey soooooo much when I am gone.
***Okay, so this ended up being a not so short post afterall! ~Amber

DOCTOR'S APPT.

I talked to "T" again today. She had just gotten out of the doctor's office. Last week he told her he was scheduling the c-section for June 2nd, but there has been a change of plans. When the nurse called to book the section, the hospital told her they already have too many inductions and c-sections scheduled on that day. The nurse had to schedule it for June 3rd instead. "T" is 1 cm. dilated now, and has been contracting more. She and I are both very worried that she will go into labor before the 3rd. She has not carried a baby this long before. Also, with this being the 4th baby, I can't imagine how she will make it another 8 days! All we can do is pray that she does. If not, we will miss the delivery and she will have to go through the surgery alone. She is really scared about having to be at the hospital by herself. I don't blame her one bit! She goes back to the doctor on Monday just to do some paperwork and have some blood drawn. The doctor said he will not check her again on Monday though.
PEACE~ AMBER

GETTING CLOSER!

I talked to "T" today. She is doing fine. She sounded upbeat and said she is ready for us to get there and for the baby to be born. She asked if I was okay and asked if we were ready! I told her we are ready and that I am fine...just nervous! She is so strong and even shows support for me, when it is her who is facing such a difficult life decision. She really amazes me!
We are going to leave on Monday...June 1st for Atlanta. On the morning of June 2nd we are picking "T" up at her apartment and all going to the hospital together. She wants it this way, and she wants us to see where she lives. I know I will be sooo nervous on the way to her apartment. I guess we will meet her kids then too, if they are awake. We will find out Tues. what time the c-section is scheduled for. I can't believe we are going to see our sweet baby's face in just a little over a week! I keep unpacking and repacking the baby's suitcase! What is wrong with me?! Then I end up just re-packing the same stuff! I guess I am just verifying that I have everything I need for the week or two that we'll be in Georgia. I will probably forget all sorts of things for myself, but Mylah should be set!
~AMBER

BIRTHMOM TRIBUTE

PLEASE PAUSE THE SONG CURRENTLY PLAYING BEFORE STARTING THE VIDEO. TO PAUSE THE SONG...GO TO THE PLAYLIST AT THE TOP RIGHT OF THE SCREEN!

This is a song/video that was recorded by a guy who was adopted. It is really sweet! Please watch...it only takes a couple of minutes.

C~SECTION DATE IS....

"T" SENT ME A TEXT MESSAGE AFTER HER DOCTOR'S APPT. SHE SAID THE C-SECTION WILL BE JUNE 2nd!!! SHE WAS EXHAUSTED AFTER TAKING THE BUS WITH ALL 3 CHILDREN TO THE DOCTOR. SHE WAS GOING TO NAP WITH THEM AND WILL CALL ME LATER. IF THERE ARE ANY NEW DETAILS I WILL UPDATE AGAIN ONCE I TALK TO HER.
PEACE~AMBER

BIRTHMOM INTERVIEW

Yesterday "T" was interviewed by the social worker that we hired in Georgia. This is called the birthmom interview. It is basically where the social worker talks to the expectant mom to be sure she truly wants to place her baby for adoption. They talk about the bmoms entire life story and what circumstances have led her to this tough decision. They also make sure no one has talked the expectant mom into an adoption plan. They want to be sure the bmom came to the decision of her own free will and that she is at peace with her plan.
I spoke with both "T" and the SW (social worker) after the interview. They both said it went well. "T" said she was a little embarrassed about some of the questions about her family history. She was raised in foster care and was later adopted. She doesn't know much about family health history, ect... I told her she should not be embarrassed at all. I talked to her about how my bio. dad left when I was three and that I have only seen him maybe 2 or 3 times since then, for less than an hour each time. I don't know much about his health or anyone else's on that side of the family. It's nothing to be ashamed of. These things are completely out of our control and nothing we chose for ourselves. Just something that we must live with and not dwell on.
The SW talked about how "T" literally has nothing but some walls around her. No furniture, no beds, nothing. I already knew this from talking to "T" and it makes me very sad. The SW has seen alot in her day, and it even broke her heart. She also talked about how strong of a woman "T" is and that she really wants to be able to provide for her 3 children. After the adoption is complete, the SW is going to get back in touch with "T". She has some things such as toys and clothes that her children no longer use. She wants to give these to them. The SW cannot do anything like this right now, because it can be viewed as coercion. The SW was really touched by "T" and the kids. She said the children are very well behaved and that "T" takes pride in being a good mother. I could already tell this by talking on the phone with her.
The next doctors appt. is tomorrow, so I will update when I hear news!
Blessings~Amber

DOCTOR VISIT

Sorry it took so long for me to post about the doctor's visit. I had a busy day yesterday! By the way, Ivey graduated from K-4 last night!!! They were sooo cute with their cap and gowns on. I talked to "T" for about an hour yesterday afternoon.The visit went well. She has still not dilated any, thank goodness! The doctor did not schedule the c-section. :( He said he will do it at her next visit. She goes back next Thursday. She is 36 weeks + 5 days today. The Dr. told her he will schedule the section for June 1st, 2nd, or 3rd. She could still go into labor on her own and need to have the c-section at that time. That is what happened with her last 2 pregnancies. The last baby delivered at 37 weeks and the one before delivered at 38 weeks. We are all hoping she will not go into labor though. If she can make it to the scheduled date then we will make it there for the delivery!! "T" said she is going to take it really easy so that she will not go into labor on her own. Let's hope that works! Each year will be very busy for our family at the end of May and early June. Here is what we will have to celebrate: My b-day is May 31st, Mylah's b-day still yet to be determined, Ivey's b-day is June 10 and our anniversary is June 14th!!! It will be very busy for those 2 weeks every year! :)
We discussed how "T" wants things to go in the hospital. She wishes for me to visit with her in her room during the day. She wants me to care for Mylah in her hospital room. She doesn't want Mylah to be stuck in the nursery all the time, and she knows there is nowhere for me and Danny to go with her to bond. "T" also said that she doesn't want to be all alone and would like my company. I'm sure we will shed lots of tears together, but I also think we will have fun getting to know one another better. She wants me and Danny to do all the bottle feeding, ect...but she wants us to be in her room mostly. I'm sure we will leave so "T" can take naps and rest, but it sounds like we will be spending a good deal of time together. I think it will be great! :)

C-Section Date

"T" goes to the doctor tomorrow. I am working tonight and probably won't sleep a wink tomorrow! I have had the worst insomnia since we were chosen by our birthmom. I told Danny today, "I give up on sleep for now, I'm not even going to get mad about it anymore!" I will just deal with being exhausted for a few more weeks! Maybe God is preparing me for the lack of sleep that a newborn brings! We find out the c-section date tomorrow!! It will probably be the 28th, but we'll see. I just hope she doesn't end up delivering early b/c we really want to be there!! I'll post about the doctor visit tomorrow.
Peace and Blessings!~Amber

Happy Mother's Day!

I had a wonderful day and I hope all you other mom's did as well! I spoke with "T" for about an hour again today. We are getting along really well and our conversations are becoming more and more relaxed! She wants us to meet her other children while we are in Atlanta. We are thrilled! I want pics of all of them and us together. Of course Brennan and Ivey won't be there, but they will have a chance to meet them someday. We did a little shopping for "T's" children today. We just bought each of the girls a doll and her baby boy a v tech driving toy. Brennan had fun wrapping up the gifts. "T" is going to have her friend bring the children to the hospital on the 2nd day after Mylah is born. ~Amber